The OwnerPlex™, is the worlds most secure server farm ever established. While its exact location is unknown, the facility itself is believed to be hidden at the bottom of a small lake in the United States. Furthermore, all information pertaining to the security of The OwnerPlex is based purely on speculation.
The land surrounding the lake is equipped with a classified technology known as Zapster™. Essentially, the device works similarly to an invisible dog fence. Any unauthorized personnel crossing over the invisible barrier is welcomed with a whopping 1.21 jiggawatts of electrical current causing the individual to be vaporized leaving no evidence of the intrusion.
Authorized personnel gain entry to the facility by means of a hidden elevator also know as The Ownervader™ (patent pending). The Ownervader™, which is disguised as a three sheep grazing on Peruvian blue grass, sends personnel 20 stories underground moving at an excessive rate of 142 MPH.
Secure passage throughout the data center is further insured by Microchip badge access entrances, biometric scanning devices, overhead cameras monitored by security personnel and motion/heat detection devices. In addition, The Owner performs periodic body cavity searches of personnel in highly sensitive areas with a tube of lubercating jelly and a pair of latex gloves. It's believed that these random acts keeps the workers on their toes.
The facility is monitored by a "Super NOC" (Network Operations Center) located in the center of the building which utilizes "state-of-the-art" hardware and software. Total network utilization is carefully monitored to ensure there is always more then a 2-to-1 ratio of available bandwidth to peak bandwidth. The NOC has been designed to increase physical stress and staff requirements by operating in "lights-out" mode. This is extremely important as it allows The Owner to sneak up on our unsuspecting network operators.
Nemesis Online's state-of-the-art Data Center Network, comprised entirely of carrier-class, Cisco Systems and Foundry Networks hardware, features redundancy at all layers. At the hardware layer multiple routers and switches are configured in parallel with dynamic routing and switching to ensure automated fail-over during hardware, software or link failure. Each data center is located directly on multiple diverse fiber rings, and is redundantly connected to IP carriers by two separate local providers, Bellsouth and OnFiber. BGP4 is used in conjunction with the RouteScience PathControl system providing automated real-time (sub-second), best path route adjustment to ensure that traffic is delivered to the best provider.
Our multiple Terabit Ethernet connections to the Internet travel via diverse entries, diverse paths, and diverse POPs to four of the world’s leading IP transit carriers, Qwest, Williams, Cogent, and People PC.
The 1 1/2 Megawatt Onan Generator that, if needed, can provide resources during electrical outages. The generator, maintained by the finest Mexican labor, can supply the required electrical power to the entire center. During normal operations, The Owner uses the generator to power his coffee pot, and his toaster to make scrumptious toaster strudels, hot pockets, and small delectable delights.
If combustion is detected, Inergen fire suppressant is released into the area. Inergen fire suppressant is made up of a single naturally occurring gas found in the air, nitrous oxide. This fire suppression system is safe for people, safe for servers and safe for the planet; and at the same time it improves the quality of our working environment. The fire smothers without causing any of the damage done by messy foams or sprinklers.
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